I did not want these young men, lifters mostly and three girls who also happened to attend that night, to come away from their first yoga experience and think yoga was for wimps; that it was boring or not relevant for them.

At one point in the class, we were in a knee down lunge, deep stretching of the quads, and they were all I think amazed at the sensations that can arrive just in holding a stretch. There was a lot of groaning and amazement, lol. I made an announcement to the class. I said, ” Ok, now here is some wisdom from your yoga teacher…. are you ready?” They nodded yes. ” When you are in a tight spot in yoga class, like right now…..yoga says, do not fight it, do not tense up or panic. Just take a deep breath and relax. Maybe move back a bit, but do not give up. And in life, when you are in a tight spot, do not panic, do not give up, just stay with it and BREATHE…..” . I cannot know for sure, but it is my feeling that they heard me. I wish that I had been told that idea so clearly when I was in high school. I did not discover yoga till I was in my 20′s and have been benefiting from it ever since.

By the end of class, final relaxation, the whole group was relaxed, quiet, able to concentrate and follow the poses and the breath. They were all, I think, completely worn out; but also completely at peace, inside and out.

This is, of coarse, the great gift of Yoga. It is not just physical. They had an experience of Peace in Body, Mind, and Spirit.

After class, some of them stayed to talk with me. One young man said, “This is the most relaxed I have felt in the last couple years….. Thank you.”

It is my belief that Yoga has tremendous things to teach young adults.
It can teach us how to listen to ourselves rather than the crowd.
Yoga can teach us how to find the inner balance of not too much and not too little.
Yoga can build strength and confidence in people who will very shortly need to move into the world independently.
Yoga traditionally is aimed at answering the questions of “Who am I?” and “What am I doing with my life?”. How perfect this fits with the needs of teens and young adults.

I guess I am writing this to encourage teachers to embrace and welcome kids, teens, and young adults to yoga. They are a bit more to handle when teaching, but oh so satisfying when it comes together.

Namaste,
Lezlie Ward

She is in the chair of honor, resplendent and nervous.
Young, three inch heels and pearls. Cocktail dress and perfectly pressed hair. To be the center of attention, she is not sure she wants to be that. But says, she and her lover agree; they have a fabulous life. And she does, and he does.
And we are all here for her, Bride to be. We future Brides, and Brides of yesteryear.
Like the spirit of Christmas Past, Present and Future. We have been in that chair.

“Don’t break the bows!”
“How many children will you have?”
“What are the colors for the wedding?”
“Tell us of the honeymoon plans.”

I recall myself, feeling nervous in that hot seat, wondering what was expected of me. It feels a life time ago. Or three. Was I really like her?

She gets a stock pot, the large one with a lid. “What do I cook in here?”

We tell her. We Brides of Weddings Past, who now know without a doubt what to do with a stock pot. We also know what to do with things she has not even imagined yet, sore ears of babies, and lost teeth of first graders. Hormones of teenagers, and achy backs of husbands.

Yes, I was absolutely like her. Eerily similar.

She is in the perfect translucent bubble of young love, newly wed, making the first home, deciding who will clean the bathroom, and who gets ready first in the morning. Will we have sex in the morning or at night? Both? And who decides that, smile. And how do we make our way through life?

And how do we make our way through life?

How do we make our way through life?

There is some arc of transaction here, some reassurance that all the women round this full room have figured it out. And our stock pots are full. Chock full of Life. Stock of Life. Sometimes more than we can comfortably handle. Sometimes the soup is bitter, and sometimes sweet. One of the greatest lessons. To learn to make a good meal out of what you have.

Will I travel as graciously through the next stage of life I see displayed before me here? Perhaps. Another great lesson. Be where you are, because time is carrying you forward to the next wedding shower, and it is not yours. Maybe it will be your daughter’s, or your granddaughter’s

She cries when she opens the gift from her feisty and fun Grandmother who shopped ahead for a perfect gift. You know the one, the cookbook in red plaid. It has served so many young women with good advice and recipes that are hard to ruin, easy to afford, and inoffensive to most palates. The cookbook will have to offer the advice since Grandmother is no longer able to attend wedding showers. She is in her grave now, a beloved Grandmother. I know this from her gravestone at the funeral I attended. Even more poignant, I understand this from the Bride’s tear-stained face.

This is a true thing. Sometimes the soup is bitter along with the sweet. Sometimes there is less life in our pot than we want.

And there is another great lesson here I think, of women, and time, of generations and humanity.
If you get a grasp on the wisdom I felt there in that room, can you tie it all in a bow and bring it to the next wedding shower? We are all in need of that collective wisdom and the tribe to share the journey with us.

How do we make our way through life, and how do we make our way out of it? And how do we nourish each other along the way? These are the questions I ponder as I make my own pot of soup on this cool fall day. And yes, I am making soup in the stock pot that my Grandmother gave me as a wedding present 19 years ago. And no, I am not following a recipe from my copy of the red plaid cookbook. I learned a while back to improvise and make a delicious soup from what life gives me, and from what is left over in the ‘frig. I have learned that no book can give me all the answers, but that a good pot of soup is always made better by friends and family to share it with. And that even if it is not a perfect pot, it is perfect to be together on a fall day sharing soup.

The wisest among us are grateful and thankful for all the soup, all the pots, all the wedding showers, and all the women, each as they pass. May I be one of those wise and grateful ones, thankful for both the bitter and the sweet. Thankful for it all.

Lezlie Ward

If you practice yoga yourself, you recall the delicious feeling at the end of class when you are fully relaxed, and your mind is resting, your body is resting, and you are fully present in your body, in your life, right then. We adults often need an hour of asana practice, or a bit of meditation to get to that place of inner quiet and rest. Some people only find this sense of ease on vacation (some not even then!) Most kids have us beat hands down in this department. They do not need an hour to get into the flow of life right now. They are living it. Yoga helps them find that sweet spot. But they can also find it on their own. IF….. they have a small space of time that is not filled in already with structure and expectation. The biggest thing they need is our support in getting a little down time.

This is not to say that structure and high expectations are not a valuable part of kids lives. But were you as busy as your kids are? Did you have something everyday after school? Did you have sensory input coming at you every hour of everyday? Kids today are can be hyped up on technology! It is fun, but it is also stimulating. 800 TV channels, Tweets, Facebook, Texting, Radio, Ipods, video clips on Youtube; all of these are great in moderation. Do your kids have some slow time and real live people time to balance all of that technology?

So how do we give kids all the enrichment that we want them to have, and at the same time honor the need of every person for a bit of calm and quiet? I believe that one of the most important tips is to first embrace the concept that time BE-ing is as valuable as time spent DO-ing.

(This would be an ideal time to ask yourself if this is really something that you consider in your own life, in the life of your family, and the schedules of your kids. Do you believe this statement? Do you apply it at all in your own family schedule?).

The irony is not lost on me that while I have been attempting to write this blog, initially, one of my daughters friends called on skype so we used the computer to see her long distance. Then on trying to complete the blog another day, while typing: my husband called me to help him move something, the door bell rang with a neighbor needing something, I had to turn down the TV in the next room set on an unbelievable blaring volume of the Disney Channel (with no one actually watching it), and the cat tipped over a glass of water. So, my bit of time to write about BE-ing and cultivating a less hectic pace, has been filled with things to do and interruptions that do not feel at all peaceful!

This is real life! How can we accomodate it and still find some peace for ourselves and our children???

Once we recognize that a bit of down time for our kids would help them feel better on the inside, then it is a matter of spotting all the opportunites for peace in our daily life. Small routines can make a very big difference. Here are some ideas that you might like to try.

For toddlers and preschoolers:

Make sure that they actually do get a nap. Your life and theirs will be dramatically more peaceful if they get the sleep they need. (this is actually true at all ages).

Create peaceful routines for your little ones to follow at nap and bedtime. This could be a song you sing, rocking them, snuggling them, reading a story, dimming the lights, some aromatherapy, saying your prayers or doing a peaceful visualization, a special blanket or toy that soothes them.

Use the adage, ‘ for happy kids, just add water’. If you are having a very challenging day, try letting them have a relaxing bath, less to get clean, and more to just let them enjoy the water. You need to be in the room with them, so bring your phone and call a friend. At the end of a half hour, you will both feel more relaxed and happier.

For young elementary school aged kids:

Set aside time for them just to have crayons and paper. Let them color. Anything. Any color. No rules, no external expectations. Let their imagination guide them.

Check for their age, what is the appropriate amount of sleep. Help them function well and in a balanced way.

Most of the truly awful days with kids can be attributed to answering the questions–

Is my child overly tired?

Is my child hungry?

Am I overly tired?

Am I overly hungry?

If at any given moment you have answered YES to 2 or more of these questions; watch out! Smile. You are not likely to have a peaceful day!

SWING! Do you remember how nice it feels to sit on a swing. I think it takes the place of rocking for babies. Let your child go out and sit on the swing. Or push them and sing your favorite song.

Be in nature. Find an hour to get outside. This can be a small local park or your own back yard. Looking at the sky helps us remember that our troubles are not so big.
For Tweens and Teens:

Encourage your older child to daydream and have her/his own thoughts. You can give her a notebook that she/he can use as a journal. Maybe they are more inclined to doodle. The idea is let them express their own ideas and feelings with out structure or expectation.

It bears repeating: Be in nature. A good friend of mine who had teens before me told me that she felt that her son who she knew had dissappeared as he entered the teen years. She and her son reconnected during a trip camping. There is something beneficial to the soul just being outside together. It does not need to be a whole weekend, just spend an hour or two hiking or bring a picnic. Do what you can do.

Help your child take a look at their commitments. If they want to be in 4 activites, is that realistic? It depends upon the schedule and the teen. Have a talk with them about what is most important to them. How will they manage their time? Offer to take the blame if they want to bow out of some activity that is not as important to them now, but they don’t know how to say no.
Family Suggestions:

Make a boundary for your children regarding how many activities are reasonable. Hold the line that _________ number of activities are the max.

Look at your family schedule as a whole. Include parents work schedules, school activites, sports, social engagements. Is there a way to shift some things or cancel some things so that it is more efficient, and sane. Try not to be a victim of your calendar! Be proactive when choosing what you and your children will participate in. Know that by bowing out of card club during baseball season for example, that might allow everyone in your family to be home together on a certain night. What would that be worth for you as a family?

Create a special family tradition that everyone enjoys together. This could be going for donuts on Saturday morning. Or reading the paper on the porch. Or Friday night movie night as a family. Or game night, checkers tournament, etc. Maybe it is going out for dinner with special friends. Or making pizza or chili together. It can be anything that your family enjoys together. If you are hoping to use this as a way of creating connection and peace within your family, then choose something that is not too difficult to do. Unless you are a gourmet chef, planning a 5 course meal every Sunday might add stress rather than reduce it. Choose what you and your kids and partner enjoy and find easy to do together.

Look for small bits of time that you can spend just BE-ing with your child. Five minutes well spent will change their day, and yours. Maybe it is just offering them a glass of milk and a snack after school and waiting to hear about their day. Maybe it is sitting with them when they find something really amusing on youtube. Maybe after they get out of the bath, you can give them a foot rub or back rub. Maybe they ask you every day to throw the ball with them, and you never have time. How would you both feel if you spent 15 minutes doing something fun together, something that was not pre-scheduled and graded or competitive.

One final suggestion. Perhaps the most important.
Imagine that your child of whatever age, is walking by; and you just take a moment to pat them on the head, or give them a hug, or even just look at them, really see them, and smile.
Imagine that now………….
I feel more peaceful. Do you?

Please feel free to add your own ideas of how to encourage downtime at your house, and ways to cultivate peace and connection with our children and our families. The best Yoga does not stay in class, it changes the way we interact with the world and within ourselves. And if we are lucky, it helps us be more mindful and loving with those we care about the most. Please take a crack at it, and remember that a small change can often make a big difference.

Peace,

Lezlie Ward

Wiping spindles of this old wooden chair, stored in the chicken coop, painted time and again and even more often… wiped clean. A woman’s hand, this time my own, wipes off this chair again and again through time. Some things are eternal themes. I feel the shadow of their hands over in and through mine. I am not the only one who has wiped the kitchen table and chairs.

Travelling in the early morning, like a ribbon of grey and a million cars
all going,
going,
the destinations are different, but the energy of get up and go to my task, start with the light; That is continuing daily, daily, daily, yearly, millenia….
the hunter up early,
and the farmer and horse at the plow.
We all get up and we go
and the huge red sun that is centered perfectly above the sea of shining bumpers and glass partitions is too the same daily, daily, yearly, millenia…
Am I as separate and alone as I think? Or am I part of this sea of humanity teeming, rolling through time, more alike than I realized?

To contact Lezlie now:
Lezlie Ward
3711 High View Way
Columbus IN
47203

email is wonderfulwards@gmail.com
our new home phone is (812) 376-3330

Blessings to you,
Lezlie

I am offering yoga classes through Total Fitness of Columbus on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday mornings at 11 am. Mondays at 11am are ‘Gentle Yoga’ so this is good for beginners, seniors, or those wanting a slower paced class that will really get deep stretching into tight muscles.

The evening classes that are currently available are Wednesdays at 7:15 pm “Stress-Reducing Yoga”
and Wednesdays at 8pm “Yoga Jams” “Yoga Jams” is a high energy class with upbeat dance music that will bring you a sense of joy and a more vigorous physical challenge. It follows one of the Zumba classes and will be a great cross-training opportunity for Zumba fans. Yoga offers more emphasis on flexibility, balance, arm strength, and mental and emotional benefits. Join me and try something new!
Total Fitness is located on Middle Road.

I am also offering individual yoga sessions at my home. Please call me if you are interested in individual yoga. My phone number is (812) 457-1414 cell or (812) 376-3330. I look forward to meeting you!
Namaste,
Lezlie

Enjoy your day. Really, I mean it!
Lezlie Ward

A friend of mine opened his wife’s underwear drawer and picked up a silk paper wrapped package:

‘This, – he said – isn’t any ordinary package.’

He unwrapped the box and stared at both the silk paper and the box.

‘She got this the first time we went to New York , 8 or 9 years ago. She has never put it on , was saving it for a special occasion.

Well, I guess this is it.

He got near the bed and placed the gift box next to the other clothing he was taking to the funeral house, his wife had just died.

He turned to me and said:

‘Never save something for a special occasion. Every day in your life is a special occasion’.

I still think those words changed my life.

Now I read more and clean less.

I sit on the settee without worrying about anything and just relax.

I spend more time with my family & friends and less at work.

Money is to be spent not saved.

I understood that life should be a source of experience to be lived up to, not survived through.

I no longer keep anything.

I use crystal glasses every day.

I’ll wear new clothes to go to the supermarket, if I feel like it.

I don’t save my special perfume for special occasions, I use it whenever I want to.

I go out with my friends whenever I want to rather than thinking I don’t have the spare money or time.

The words ‘Someday…’ and ‘ One Day….’ are fading away from my dictionary.

If it’s worth seeing, listening or doing, I want to see, listen or do it now….

I don’t know what my friend’s wife would have done if she knew she wouldn’t be there the next morning, this nobody can tell.

I think she might have called her relatives and closest friends.
She might call old friends to make peace over past quarrels.
She might have told everyone how much she loved them.

I’d like to think she would go out for Chinese, her favorite food.

It’s these small things that I would regret not doing, if I knew my time had come.

Each day, each hour, each minute, is special.

Live for today, for tomorrow is promised to no-one.

If you got this, it’s because someone cares for you and because, probably, there’s someone you care about, if it helped you, pass the link to someone who might enjoy it Today. Don’t wait till tomorrow to follow your heart, and do what is important to you.